After the Rift
Colonic Computer Virus
199919 tracks1 hr 18 minProgressive Metalcore
Y2K. Dial-up. The end of the world, buffering.
Now playingDial-Up Dry Hump
0:003:30
Liner notes
The rift was open, and the devil was the least of it. In late 1999 Dutch bought a computer for the shop. It came with a free trial of something. That something got out.
Colonic Computer Virus is the band’s Y2K album: a virus crawls out of a dial-up modem, takes over the planet, and the only men who can stop it think “the cloud” is what comes out of Sal’s truck. They fight it with hammers, floppy disks, and the one troubleshooting step they know: turning it off and turning it back on again.
“We did not defeat the machine. We merely unplugged it, and plugged it back in, with conviction.” — Buck Fontaine, words ten through twenty-six since 1984
Credits
- Lead guitar
- Dirk "Lugnut" Hammerstrom, performed while on hold with tech support
- Rhythm guitar
- Rusty "Torque" Kowalczyk, on a guitar plugged straight into the shop's phone line
- Keys / synth
- Lance Velour, on the keyboard that came with Dutch's computer; he is still looking for the synth button
- Drums
- Sal "Meat Wagon" Bronco, on a stack of beige computer towers, struck until they turned off and back on again
- Bass
- Buck Fontaine, unplugged, then plugged back in, with conviction
- Vocals
- None. The dial-up modem handles the high notes.
- Recorded at
- Bay 3, Dutch's Muffler & Brake (during the free trial)